Watch Tom Brady in the World’s Most Ridiculous Mattress Commercial

Brady plays some sort of wooden, turtle-necked super spy obsessed with bare mattresses. I don’t know what this is.

I don’t know what this is supposed to be – or what it’s supposed to mean or imply.

It feels like a Gucci or Chanel ad, which must be the point.  But in the end, a bare, Simmons Beautyrest mattress sits in a room with a four-time Superbowl Champion staring at it seductively.  A concierge asks the UGGS spokesman if he needs anything, to which Tom responds coldly, “No, not a thing.”

There are a three questions that I need answered:

  1. What is Tom Brady going to do to that mattress?
  2. Why doesn’t he need any blankets or sheets.
  3. Who’s idea was the turtleneck?

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